One of those days

I don't even know anymore..

Sometimes in life you can feel so certain, so sure that you're happy, that you know where you're going and who to trust.. but it never stays like that forever. Right now I feel so lost with no direction, unfulfilled and.. lonely. How could something make me so happy yet so sad? How is it okay that something can make you feel so weak? Over the years I've tried not to be so open, to not be so naive, and be the wise girl.. but somehow, I still feel so vulnerable?

Love is never easy to find and it definitely does not come to those who do not fight for it. I wonder what it'll be like when I finally find the one? One thing I know for sure is that I'll look back on these days and know that it's all over now, that all I had to do was stay in control and let nature take its course. Nothing is forever. It sounds so cliche, but every truth is a cliche, cliches are just situations, words, anything that's been repeated through history too many times that it's become typical, almost expected. The problem with cliches is that you know it, but it doesn't change how you feel when it finally hits you.

These years should be the best years of my life, but why do I feel like I'm still missing so much? Is it because no matter how far you go or how much you make, it all doesn't matter if you have no one to share it with? (another cliche).
This probably isn't the correct use of this old quote but, if a tree falls down in the woods and no one hears it did it happen? That's how I feel, I feel as if, no matter what I accomplish if I don't have someone to share it with, was it worth it? What determines the achievement if no one is there to acknowledge it?

So where is this all going? What happens at the end of the road? I use to look forward to the future but now I'm almost afraid. How time slips by so fast and so slow.. what I have can leave so fast and what I want seems unreachable.

Maybe I'm just having one of those days..